The First Day

**This is for people who are daily drinkers**

Whether you have chosen sobriety on your own or you have come to it through a different way, there is no doubt about it that its scary.  Especially if it is something that you have been using for years as a coping mechanism.  It is totally normal to feel scared.   You are stepping out of your comfort zone.   You are excited but nervous.  You may feel a bit of doubt, it may be your 100th try at getting sober.  Don’t worry, because most people stumble on the way to sustained sobriety.  Every time we fail, we learn something new about ourselves and the process.  Its a journey, don’t be so hard on yourself.  One day you just get it.  

Towards the end of the day, you may start hearing that whisper in your ear that you could and should have a drink tonight.  As well as a million other reasons this is stupid, not worth it and that a lot of people you know drink like you. This is totally normal.  Our brains are very smart.  They know the thought pathways we have traveled every single day.  They are familiar with them, and they automatically want what is familiar.  This is the hardest part about getting sober.  You are going to feel like you aren’t happy drinking, but you aren’t happy not drinking.  This is because we are going against our brains natural paths.  It feels yucky and hard and you just want to go back to the easier thing.  BUT it wasn’t the easier thing or you wouldn’t be here. You really have to fight back against what you think you want right now.  Its hard to see clearly when your in it.  Alcohol is making you feel this way, once you get through this, you will see exactly what I mean.

We have to build new pathways in our brains that don’t automatically go to alcohol.  Its called training the brain (neuroplasticity).  I like to think of it like a spiders web.  You are a spider.  Every day you chose alcohol.  Every time the alcohol is chosen, it forms a single web connecting the spider and the booze.  Done again and again, each tiny thread of a web turns into a thick strong web, thus this is our strongest pathway.  On the other side there are healthier coping mechanisms, like baths, walks, books, massages, yoga etc., but we don;t have a strong web attached to them yet, and we just want our booze.  It works instantly.  However, if you fight that path to go to the booze, the spider will have to take a different route, to a healthier option, but it wont feel natural at first.  It will feel wobbly and not solid, because the spider doesn’t have a strong web.  Over time, if you keep ignoring the booze, and choosing the healthy options, the booze web disintegrates and goes away.  Now, the healthier coping mechanisms have a strong web attached to them, and they are the natural pathway your brain will take.

This concept is simple, but that does not mean that it is easy.  Does this take time, yes, but not as long as we think.  We just have to get through today.  Day 1, choose the healthier coping mechanism.  Just for today.  Don’t think about all the future events you cant handle without alcohol etc.,  Focus just on today.  24 hours.

Remember, if you want something you’ve never had, you have to do something you’ve never done.  Nothing grows in your comfort zone. 

**If you are physically addicted to alcohol, please do not try this at home and seek medical attention.  Alcohol Detox can be fatal if not done correctly.**

2 thoughts on “The First Day

  1. Exactly what I needed to hear today. I have been off and on the sobriety roller coaster for over a year. Most of the time off and some of the time on. It sucks. I enjoy being off the roller coaster but my crazy brain brings me back. I had a pretty good amount of time off the crazy roller coaster but jumped back on recently. I need to get off. It’s that crazy roller coaster, with hoops and loops and crazy drops. Day 1’s always suck. But not nearly as bad as being on the roller coaster. Stepping off the roller coaster, again. Hoping this time will be longer than the time before. Or forever. One never knows – but can hope.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Good for you girl! I know exactly what you mean about the ups and downs. It is exhausting!! I did that for a long time too. The biggest thing that helped me, was just to make a firm decision. For years I had gone back and forth.. all while knowing my best self was when I was sober. I tend to want to control everything in my life. Once I just let go, and let whatever happens happen, it really wasn’t as bad as I had imagined, in fact, I do not ever want to go back to where I was! There is a relief in just letting go, surrendering, trusting the process. That’s where the real work begins 🙂 Rooting for you my friend!!


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